Every year, thousands of South Koreans – mostly middle-aged men – die quietly and alone, cut off from their family and friends. It sometimes takes days or even weeks before their bodies are found.
These are the country’s “lonely deaths,” known as godoksa in Korean. It’s part of a larger problem of loneliness and isolation across the country, an issue so pressing the government is pulling out all the stops to fight it.
In the bustling capital Seoul, city authorities announced this week they would spend 451.3 billion won (nearly $327 million) over the next five years to “create a city where no-one is lonely.”
Their new initiatives include loneliness counselors available on a 24/7 hotline, an online platform for similar counseling, as well as follow-up measures including in-person visits and consultations, according to the metropolitan government.
“Loneliness and isolation are not just individual problems, but tasks that society must solve together,” Seoul mayor Oh Se-hoon said in a news release. The city will “mobilize all of our municipal capacity” to help lonely people heal and “return to society,” he added.
The city also plans to introduce expanded psychological services and green spaces; nutritional meal plans for middle-aged and elderly residents; a dedicated “search system” to identify isolated residents who need help; and activities to encourage people to venture outside and connect with others, such as gardening, sports, book clubs and more.
Experts have welcomed the measures but say more needs to be done – partly because loneliness in Korea is tied to certain unique parts of Korean culture that are difficult to change.
“Loneliness is a significant social issue right now, so efforts or policies to address it are absolutely necessary,” said An Soo-jung, a psychology professor at Myongji University – cautioning, however, that “there needs to be careful consideration about how effectively these measures will be implemented.”
Thousands of lonely deaths
The problem of loneliness has gained national attention over the past decade as the number of related issues increased – such as young people who withdraw from the world and spend their days isolated at home, often for months at a time. The phenomenon, known by the Japanese term “hikikomori,” has become increasingly common; South Korea had up to 244,000 such recluses in 2022 by one estimate.
The number of lonely deaths has also been rising – reaching 3,661 last year, up from 3,559 in 2022 and 3,378 in 2021, according to the Ministry of Health and Welfare’s latest figures released last week.
Part of that increase could be the ministry’s new, broader definition for “lonely death.” While in previous years the body had to be found only after “a certain amount of time” to qualify as a “lonely death,” the term now applies to anyone who lives in social isolation, cut off from family or relatives, and dies due to suicide or illness.
Another factor behind the uptick could be the country’s demographic crisis. An aging population and declining birthrate mean there have been consistently more deaths than births in recent years. South Korea’s overall death rate is rising – and that includes lonely deaths.
But the figures still speak to a larger problem that seems to impact middle aged and elderly men the most.
More than 84% of the lonely deaths recorded last year were male, more than five times the number of female deaths, according to the ministry. Men in their 50s and 60s made up more than half the total group, making them “particularly vulnerable to the risk of dying alone.”
What makes Koreans so lonely?
Loneliness isn’t unique to South Korea, and “it’s difficult to say that Koreans are particularly lonelier than others,” said An, the psychology professor. However, when asked about what makes them feel lonely, “there are some differences compared to other countries,” she said.
In some cultures, loneliness is seen as a feeling that happens “when relationships are not fulfilling,” An said. “In Korea, people say they feel very lonely when they feel they’re not worthy enough or lack purpose.”
A study from June this year found that the epidemic of loneliness reflects nuances in Korean culture, which “emphasizes relational orientation” – or people defining themselves in relation to others around them. As a result, South Koreans may feel deep loneliness or a sense of failure if they feel they’re not “making a significant impact on others or society,” the study said.
This is a major difference from other countries, according to An. Koreans may have a thriving social life and close connections to others, but they may still feel lonely “when they compare themselves to others and question whether they are useful, contributing enough to society, or falling behind.”
The study also identified other factors such as the rise in single-person households, decline in social interactions outside work and family, the dominance of social media and how it fosters feelings of inadequacy, and South Korea’s competitive, “achievement-oriented” culture, which drives feelings of loneliness among those falling short of their own goals.
“When we all pursue the same values excessively, we end up losing ourselves,” An said. “Our society demands highly collective social living but often fails to respect the individual” – meaning people struggle to deal with solitude or the feeling of failure.
Government efforts
South Korean authorities have launched various initiatives over the years to combat the problem, including the Lonely Death Prevention and Management Act which ordered the government to compile a comprehensive preventative plan and a five-yearly situation report.
And in 2023, the government passed an amendment making some reclusive youth eligible for financial support, including up to 650,000 won ($475) per month for living expenses, to help them “re-enter society.”
South Korea isn’t alone in fighting this battle.
Japan, where the hikikomori trend was first recognized and studied in depth, appointed a Minister of Loneliness and Isolation in 2021. The following year, the government released an intensive plan of countermeasures including a 24/7 consultation service and the expansion of counseling and social work programs.
Other countries, including the United Kingdom, have similarly appointed ministers of loneliness. The United States Surgeon General warned of an “epidemic of loneliness and isolation” in a 2023 advisory, urging measures such as building stronger social infrastructure and regulating online platforms.
Even the World Health Organization launched a commission to fight loneliness in 2023, calling it a “pressing health threat.”
But An said she had “doubts about whether simply expanding physical connections will fundamentally solve the problem of loneliness … It’s not something that can be easily changed by a single policy.”
Because there are complex, culturally-specific factors at play, a larger shift may be needed so individuals can “develop the strength to be alone and face themselves,” she said.
“We need to cultivate the ability to care for both ourselves and others. But our life in society is so tough, so it feels like we lack the time to even care for ourselves.”
